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Friday, May 22, 2009

The Life and Death of Big Boss

Ok, this video explains the revelation from neighbour Brigit.  I sincerely hope that it doesn't offend anyone.

By the way, I have my ring now.  I'm wearing it.  It's pretty cool.  Some things are different like washing my face.  I took it off to shower, I don't know if this is common or not.  It fits real well.  I have to wiggle it to take it off, but I figured out that you can twist it like a screw and this gets it off without it being abbrassive to your finger.

Because of these technical difficulties I will be hosting the videos on youtube.  Let me know if you are having issues watching them.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Instructional Feeding Videos!

Ok, today Holly and I are hosting a mother's day / Victoria Secret Day brunch.

This reminded me that I should put up the instructional videos on feeding fish that I made last week up. I didn't think they were very good cause of length issues in production, but, there is 10 minutes of film here so buckle up and watch it over lunch or while your boss is gone poo or something. I wanted to induce a feeding frenzy and forgot that it doesn't happen automatically.

Today I have just filmed another video after a starking revelation from my neighbour. Look for that.

Also, last night Holly and I went to see Angel's and Demon's. Pretty good, much better than the piece of crap Da Vinci Code, but you know, not that great. They took out some stuff from the book that was ridiculous, and it was an enjoyable time. I recommend. Also, Holly was happy that Tom Hanks got rid of his goofy haircut. Ewan McGreggor has not been a very good actor since Trainspotting. Maybe Star Wars has ruined his career.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Worlds Largest Goldfish!!

Big thanks for finding this to Brenda.

Ex movie star Jackie Chan is Ponding with me and he has developed the biggest documented goldfish in the known world.

Big ups to Jackie on accomplishing this.  I mean, It's not like his fish have been cryogenically frozen and brought back to life, but it's a nice solid a achievement.

One worthy of our recognition I'd say.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

End of Tax Season Brought Death and Despair

This is the last of the videos that before the ring video.

I show you what I did after tax season was immediately completed. Enjoy!

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Reporting live from Waterfront Park

Adam's Post #2

Just like the little zombie kid at Waterfront Park, I love turtles. I wonder how that kid handled his internet exposure. He probably hates turtles by this point.
I was on my bike the other day and I came across a snapping turtle on a sidewalk near the train station. He was getting ready to cross the street. I snapped a couple pics with a camera phone. I had to take pictures of the phone's screen to get them on the computer, so they're sort of blurry. You can get an idea of how big this guy was. I immediately thought of the carnage he'd inflict on the pond. Not even Big Boss could manage this guy. Turtles would be a pretty cool experiment in the pond. I had two turtles as a kid. I'd catch minnow fish at the pond near my place and put them in the tank live. The turtles would hunt them down and eat them whole. Good times.

Here's a pic of the turtle. I put one of my cycling gloves on his shell to give some size perspective.

Here's another pic. Sorry about the quality. This turtle was really big, and had a spiky tail, huge claws and neon green eyes. I was afraid to pick him up because of salmonella and the huge claws. I hope he/she survived. He was on the sidewalk of a busy part of Princess St. It probably took him hours to climb the grassy hill from the marsh.

I've been away from the pond for a couple weeks now, and I must say, I miss it. I hope the little guys can figure out their food issue. I remember the first couple times we tried feeding them. Big Boss was the only guy who was swallowing the food whole. He's like a piranha in comparison to the wee comets. Grinding up the food before feeding seems to work, but it's hard to tell whether they're eating it or if it's just dissolving into the water.

I'm not sure about Big Boss' current status, but here's a quick bio. Last I heard, he was out of action, but it's pretty common for this guy to lock himself away for a couple days when he has to get things done.

Given Name: Big Boss

Family Name: Oranda

Species: Carassius auratus (goldfish)

Special Characteristics: big, ball shaped, slow moving, large tail and fins, big brained.

Special Skills: Can eat whole food pellets in a single bite.

Age: At least 20 days, probably 50+.

Occupation: Boss of the [Tom's not Tom's pond, it belongs to the community] pond.

Office: The ceramic pot in the north west corner of the pond.

Lifestyle: A loner, limits his public exposure, probably works 50-60 hour weeks.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Imagine What Could be Happening, Prob if McCain Won

In a conversation with a good pal last night, we began talking about the little fish and about how they are dying out mainly because they cannot fit even the smallest food I could find into their mouths.

Ben then imagined how strange it would be if it was like that for us.  Imagine if for some reason all the food on earth was like apple shaped, with protein and vitamins in them, and for some messed up reason, god (me, in the case of the fish), didn't have the decentcy to cut up the apples so they'd fit into our mouths.

Then imagine, we have no hands and the apples float in the air at about chest height.  How ridiculously annoying would that be.

Basically, your hungry after a long day of hiding under rocks from birds and squirrels, you don't even know what these things are but they huge, there's a giant scummy thing that sucks you toward it, you don't what this is, but whatever, all your older friends can eat, 3 guys you know tell you stories about how they were frozen and then dethawed, you don't believe a word, and when it's feeding time, you can't eat because the food won't fit into your mouth, wtf?

Now, if your having a bad day, say, at least the food my god, (be it an actual deity if you are religous, your parent, your partner, or your grocer/restauranteur, or yourself) is making fits into your mouth, and if it doesn't at least you have hands to use utensils to cut it up.

C'mon people, brighten up.

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Cooking in Masao's Apartment

Note, now in the bottom right of the blog you can check out video's from a guy that is hilarious.  Jay and I informally know him through our hockey forums.  He's actually really smart, has completed law school, knows 3 languages, is really well read, but comes off goofy in the videos.

I get a lot of laughs out of his videos, they inspired me to make my own.  I try not to copy him too much but sometimes I might.

He really likes sambuca.

He is French Canadian, lives in MTL, also half Japanese and 1/4 Italian.  His house is a mess.  His girlfriend/wife of many years recently left him, but he's upbeat.

He's a socialist, and a philosopher, enjoy!  But not as much as my videos!!!

Fish out playing volleyball like in Topgun

Ok, this was made on April 27.  Sunny day, they love to come out in the sun.  If it's not sunny they hide under rocks.  In this video you will see Big Boss.  He is the only different species of goldfish in the pond, Adam can elaborate on this.

He bought Big Boss with Jessie and was hoping to surprise me with him but when we looked in the pond, he was hiding, he was always hiding. 

He was round and fat and devoured food like a human of this shape would.  He didn't really have any friends and would hang out in the top left quadrant (from where I normally film.)

These are some pictures of Big Boss in his prime.  Notice how robust and jubilant he looks.  He reminds me of Danny Devito from Twins, and the white finned Cryo is Arnold.   So funny, when Arnold gets pregnant and wants stroodle.  I love Arnold, make prop 8 happen Arnold!

Anyways, enjoy the video, next time I will explain why we have a new pump now and a waterfall.

Monday, May 4, 2009

One Ring To Rule All The Fish

Ok, let's take a timeout. Life can be a little stressful at times. Let's face it, it happens to all of us. Whether you work in an office as an accountants assistant, and taking care of fish in your off time, or are a Queens University Masters student, learning all there is to know about the world of labour relations, you need some time off your day and night jobs to enjoy the smaller things.

Thus, I have decided to not talk about fish at all today, and actually come to you from the present, and show you my wedding ring.

I may show you the pond in the end of the video but it's very brief.

I also will give you some home gardening tips in this video, look for those.

By the way, I saw the movie Wallstreet on sunday. Real good. I recommend it. Realistic story about how wallstreet really does control the North America and a good part of the world. Those that work in the Government and are very isolated from this stuff should watch it for sure. Oliver Stone is a wicked director. Mike Douglas is awesome, and Charlie Sheen was pretty decent before he got all messed up. The reason I chose to watch was because I heard about the sequel at work and I recently discovered that I can download at work really quickly and I don't have to worry about going over my limit.

The new movie will have Shia Le Steak which is not a good choice, he must have a real awesome agent. They needed a young guy though, so Charlie was out. Also he's an embarassment because of his disgusting tv show.

Anyways, please, sit back and enjoy the video.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Day 2, Continued in video format.

First off, huge thanks to Adam for the information and posting. Amzing insight and hilarious as alyways. In present time I write to you after helping Ben and Lyndsay move into their new place. It's super nice. I've never done a more organized move in my life.

I have memories of quite the opposite in a move involving Gilmour street. I'd be pissed off if I didn't like who I was moving so much.

Anyhow, the rest of the day in question was really fun. I went to work, that was ok, because I knew the night ahead would include a delicious meal and absolute comedy.

Hanging out with Jessie's friends is alyways a strange but fun time. People from Timmins I have found out are kind of weird. I really like weird people though.

Enjoy the short vids: